A Wedding and Inspiration

Yesterday afternoon we met Tona and Censio downtown for their civil ceremony.  They arrived together by moto, and their ‘padrinos’ (two witnesses, kind of like best man and maid of honor) arrived on another.  There were two other couples getting married, too. 

When it was Tona and Censio’s turn, the wedding party entered the attorney's office.  The attorney looked at Rosemary and called out to Daisy that her clothing was unacceptable because she had on ‘short pants’.  Didn’t we see the sign? 

(There was a hand-written sign in the lobby, saying no guns, no short pants, no low tops, etc.  We figured it meant the kind of very short shorts which are quite common here.)

The attorney then addressed Rosemary.  You are wearing short pants.  Didn’t you see the sign?   It is likely that the attorney did not mean to be unkind, but Rosemary's head dropped and her shoulders sagged as she was chided. (Rosemary was wearing a pair of knee-length walking shorts which were longer than the skirts of several women there.)

Censio & Tona holding hands
as the ceremony begins!

Thankfully, the attorney allowed the ceremony to go forward!

The ceremony was short, but very touching.  Tona and Censio held hands for a part of it, and both seemed a little nervous.  When it was their turn to sign the register, they both signed their full names without hesitating. 


It was wonderful to see this couple, who have been together for more than 20 years, taking this important step.


Then Rosemary took her turn signing.  At first she hadn’t wanted to be a padrina because she cannot read and write.  Daisy had assured her all she would need to do is sign her name that she had witnessed the ceremony.  Rosemary signed her name slowly, writing each letter carefully.  

Rosemary signing her name.

Once again the attorney called out to Daisy.  She cannot read so she shouldn’t be a witness.  Daisy made her way into the room to talk with the attorney.  Perhaps because it was in the middle of the ceremony, instead of going some place private, the attorney talked with Daisy in front of the wedding party. 

She was concerned that things be done legally, which is understandable.  It was disappointing, however, that she chose to talk about Rosemary as if she was not standing there, able to hear every word.

Legally married.

Daisy put her arm around Rosemary and explained that she was a special part of the community and was important to Tona.  After a few more minutes of conversation, the attorney allowed the ceremony to continue.

Sealed with a kiss!

The ceremony ended with the declaration and a kiss.  Before leaving, after hugging Tona and shaking Censio’s hand, we all made sure to hug Rosemary and tell her how special she is to us. 

Outreach participants sometimes ask us why the people of El Callejon don’t look for a better place to live.  Even those who are sent money from family elsewhere may add onto their homes and buy better TVs and motos, but will typically stay in El Callejon.  For many of us, it seems that any place would be an improvement. 

Thanking Rosemary after the ceremony

But, in El Callejon, Rosemary is a business woman who owns a Colmado (a little store that sells everything from rice to toilet paper to sodas).  She can’t read and write, but neither can lots of women there.  Everyone knows her, her ‘husband’, her two sons, Tule and Franklin, and she knows them.    

Don’t get us wrong!  We are not trying to glamorize the lives of the people of El Callejon!  Rosemary’s life is not easy.  Her ‘husband’ is not faithful, and when she was diagnosed with an STD from one of his dalliances, he blamed her.  Her sister is not kind to her, despite the fact that Rosemary helps care for her daughter.   

Yes, a lot of things in Rosemary’s life are difficult and unfair.  But, it is home, and she knows where she fits into the fabric of the community.  Outside of El Callejon, she is looked down on because she doesn’t have nice clothes or other things, because she is not able to read and write.  Outside of El Callejon she is constantly reminded of what she is lacking, of her state of poverty. 

Congratulations Censio & Tona!

Part of our site’s mission is to help restore dignity to Rosemary and all the women of El Callejon.  We want to see her life improve, but for Rosemary (and many others!) that means staying and working from within El Callejon.  

I doubt the attorney realizes it, but our experience yesterday was actually inspiring, because it strengthened our resolve to continue pouring the love of Jesus into the people of El Callejon.  Sure, at times they can frustrate and disappoint us. They make bad choices over and over again. But, they are our sisters and brothers in Christ, a part of our family, and we love them. 

What an honor to share with them that they are precious and of great value.  After all, Jesus gave up Heaven in order to come for the El Callejons of the world.  We are a tiny part of His redeeming work.  What a privilege, what a blessing!